I understand his frustration. When it feels like you have to wade through the confusing mess of marketing to get to the thing you LOVE to do? you alternate between gritting your teeth and binge-watching Netflix to escape.

I shared some tips with him that completely changed his perspective, and I thought they would be useful for you, too.

Tip 1: Connect first

While you can educate people in your marketing, the first thing that you need to do is to connect with them. You do this by referring to the symptom that the client is aware that they have, not the problem that you know is causing the symptom.

(I know you want to share your expertise, and get people to a better place. But slow down and hear their pain first. They?ll appreciate you for it!)

Think of this as the difference between:

Is there a blockage in your aorta?

Vs

Do you have chest pains?

The first question is medical language, and while it?s meaningful to doctors, doesn?t mean much to the lay person. The second refers to the symptom that the client is aware of. Using the language of the client helps you to connect.

Tip 2: Focus on what they want, not what they need?

Especially with transformation, what the potential client wants is usually not what they need. If they get what they need, they will ultimately get what they want. But you can?t sell them ?what they need?… at least not without a lot of education first.

If you start the marketing communication with what they need, they usually won?t hear you. Instead, after connecting with them on their symptom, or pain, then move into the result that they want, not what they need to get there.

Here?s an example for a ?singles coach?:

You need to remove the limiting beliefs and patterns that are keeping you trapped in?

Vs

There?s a system to support you in attracting the love of your life.

The 2nd one goes straight to the result & the benefit, and doesn?t dwell on the process. (Yep, I know you love your process – I do too! But the client doesn?t care.)

Tip 3: Educate only when you have the time

Marketing includes everything from a headline, or question, to an elevator speech, to a 2-hour workshop or Signature Talk. When you have very little time to be heard (for example, a headline) don?t try to educate your potential clients on what they need. Teachers (and most transformational entrepreneurs) usually try to include a teaching even in something as short as an elevator speech. Your potential clients aren?t ready to hear the teaching, until your words about the symptom (pain) and result (benefit) resonate first.

When you have time:

When you?re leading a workshop, writing an article, or giving a Signature Talk, you have time to educate. You can take people along this path.

Your pain ? caused by this problem ? needs this solution

When you don?t have much time:

When you?re sharing your elevator speech, writing a headline or short copy, you need this path.

Your pain ? can be transformed into this awesome result

(no teaching involved, just inspiration)

After all, this blog post wasn?t called ?don?t teach? 🙂